Sunday, August 30, 2009

"Dekh ke mujhko haansta gaata...sadh gayi yeh duniya sadh gayi"

Well, The title is a line from a very peppy number of "Love Aaj Kal". But today I realised that when the girl sings this line she conveys a much deeper meaning than the obvious.

Tell me something...if you are a girl "How many times have you thought 'what will the others think?' before doing something?"
And if you are a guy "How many times have you commented behind a girl's back(especially a friend)?"

I wont get your answers so at least be true to yourself.

If you have observed the questions you would have understood what I'm trying to point out. This bloody world has always asked a girl to think before she acts; never a guy. Ever asked why? Or you thought it was way too convenient so dint bother to question it?

As a guy have you ever asked your mom to just be modest and not be too modern or hyper? Have you seen your dad do the same? Let me guess the answer is yes. And if its no, then probably your mom hasn't asked your suggestion as she already knows the answer.
As a girl also you would have done the same. But there is a difference.Why?

Frankly we live in a world full of MCPs. In our world its always about the male. And the image of an ideal female (girl daughter wife mother)has always been the meek, soft spoken, non-challenging person. In other words the "goody goody girl". But who decided this is what a good girl should be? You guessed it the bloody insecure males. Because they are so afraid that the lady will take over the reigns. Maybe all this is sounding very male bashy and done to death feminist speech like. So here is something that you can ask yourself and check the truth.

Every guy has his little kingdom, where he is respected and where he is valued. For example in college take the class you study in. All is well in the world because its a class full of guys, all are best buddies. Then two girls enter the same class and sit in the first bench. In the class one pretends as though she doesn't exist while the other interacts in class. Whom do you roll your eyes at? What do you call her? Showoff? Know it All?
They are new so after the class is over the active one approaches you for your help and asks you for your number. Do you hesitate? Or do you give yourself a mental hi-fi?
After she leaves do you tell your friends the truth or you just give them "that look" as though she was falling all over you?
She calls you first. Do you decide she is desperate? Do you go announce to your friends that she called you or ask them to come over and listen to your conversation?

In an informal gathering there are some inappropriate jokes cracked. The meek one shies away while the bold one just has a good laugh along with the others and forgets it. After the gathering when you are with your buddies what do you say about the bold one? That she was a sport? Or that she was being cheap and vulgar?

I'm sure all of you have gone through one of these situations. Just recall how you reacted then. Now tell me, what did she do wrong? Was she actually being cheap or just not fitting into this preconceived notion of the "good girl"? What was her mistake that made her the subject of your criticism? Who the hell are you to even judge her or criticize her? Do you fit into the ideal male, "good boy" category yourself? Are you wondering what in the world is that?

Even for the girls who haven't been the outgoing ones. How many times have you considered the bold girl as cheap and unfit to be one among you? Why? Was it actually her behavior that disgusted you? Was it the notion of "appropriate behavior" so deeply ingrained in you? Or was it plain jealousy that you couldn't do what she did?

I say she is not wrong at all. It is your mindset, a mindset as archaic and outdated as the evolution of this male chauvinistic society. So all I'm trying to say is next time you are about to say something or form an opinion about "that" girl think again to see if you are being led by an archaic train of thought. Because if you are then you are the misfit not she.